Qualities Of a Good Friend: Friendship; when it comes to friendship or anything in relation to friendship, some people will definitely be closer to you than others. Some people may just appear as casual friends however there is a sit of friendship reserved for just a few and those friends belong to the inner circle.
They are the ride or die kind of friends, the ones that always has your back, because of the categories of relationship we have with others, there is a need for specific qualities to set aside and define these friendship and the relationship we have with people, however, there are possible chances that we have not taken our time to define and tell these friendships apart.
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Qualities of a Good Friend
1. Trustworthy: There is no exception in a relationship with regards to trust. Every relationship needs trust as its bed rock and foundation in other to stand firm and strong. When every relationship is mentioned, friendship is not an exception. Therefore the quality of a good friend is that they are trustworthy and genuine.
According to Jamie Gruman, Ph.D., she said that a friend is one who lets us open up ourselves to them without the fear of them betraying our confidence or making us feel ashamed for our weakness and mistakes. In so doing, this helps us to understand ourselves better and appreciate our inner strength.
2. Supportive: Nothing can remove the strength of a supportive friend, this is because a supportive friend is a lifeline to the friendship and to the other.
A friend can provide various forms of support to another friend and such support could be emotional support, financial support, psychological support, etc. the support from a friend automatically gives us the reinforcement and encouragement that we need to get up and face our challenges headstrong, it’s like adding fuel to a car.
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3. Acceptance: A good friend accept you for your perfections and imperfections. The reason why you are comfortable around that person is because they have made you feel safe and comfortable.
Regardless of the fact that you are not in any way perfect hence, you can be yourself around them. A good friend accepts you unconditionally but will not be afraid to tell you the unpleasant truth that no one else would tell you about yourself.
A Friend is like a mirror in which you see yourself from another’s perspective. Also, it is added that they are not judgmental, regardless of what your friend has done, the other friend should not in any way judge them.
4. Listening: We all need someone to actively listen to us, then consider the situation when you need your friend to listen and pay attention to you but they do not, it would in no way make you happy. While a friend will listen to what you have to say, a good friend will actively listen and engage with you and hear what you have to say.
They ask questions and attentively respond to your answers, when you are answering, they try to understand your point of view, and do not judge your answers. They sound broad and rather than being a coach, they listen and they won’t give advice if they are just meant to listen. This is because sometimes, we just need someone that will listen to us while we talk.
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5. Emotional availability: Same way romantic partners are emotionally available, friends, a good friend is very much emotionally available more than the supposed partner. They make you feel heard, acknowledge us and listen to our point of views on any subject matter.
When we have emotionally available friends, we feel appreciated and good about ourselves, rather than feeling ignored or dismissed, as a result of this attribute, we tend to share our lives with each other making us feel connected, both combats loneliness and help you evade distressing circumstances. Even when your friend or best friend do not live nearby, you still maintain a very close relationship with them.
6. Similar interest: Another prove of a good friend and the reason why you are good friends with your friend is because, you both have something’s in common. These things we share in common with our friends are similar in terms of our value, beliefs, and our views about things that matter to us.
Dr. Gruman once said that because our personalities and opinions are similar, this gives us a sense of belonging that satisfies that human need to be connected to others, we feel together, united with a sense of belonging with our friends.
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7. Positivity: Good friends are one of the best when it comes to emotional and mental health. They help bring out the best in life for you to see and love. They teach you how to love life more, to be optimistic, and to live your life to the fullest.
They always show you the fact that life is an adventure and it’s not spent by sitting down and watching it go by and the trust that they will be there to make every minute count and the journey fun and exciting.
8. They are Reciprocal: Creating a balance in any relationship is important, especially the balance of give and take. The quality of a good friendship is that reciprocity exists, no one is selfish about most of their needs and this leads to a satisfactory relationship between friends.
This does not mean that one friend carries all the burden in the relationship, however, one carries the ball and the other does too. When the support is coming from just one side of the relationship, at some point, the supporter would give up.
There are definitely some friends who would out do the other but this is fine so long as the other party reciprocates the gesture because some people are naturally born to give more.
9. Has your best interest in mind: Sometimes, we get this feeling that our friends knows us better than we know ourselves. They get us up our feet and root for us when we are feeling down and not feeling like our own fan at the moment.
They are our biggest cheerers and greatest advocate, and they help keep us on track of our achievements, they serve as our accountability chat, and do not fail in keeping us focused on the goal. When our self-worth is in doubt, they help to reenergize us and continue cheering us to greater heights.
10. Loyalty: Ever had a friend who forfeits everything to help you out in your time of need? That is a good friend, hold them tight and close. They are always there when we need them and they lighten our loads, provide a shoulder for us to lean on and also help us shoulder the inevitable hurdles, stresses, and the crises that life throws at us.
They make what appears to be an inaccessible mountain into a small hill that can be easily scaled. They are always there to makes things easy.
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In our world today, it is very difficult to find good friends as everyone is mostly self-centered, however, this does not exclude the fact that there are still so many good friends out there who would give us the best experience of what friendship is all about.
However, in your quest to find good friends (if you do not have one already), you should first of all find yourself, be your friend and a good friend to yourself, in that way, others would find you a good friend to them too.
Edeh Samuel Chukwuemeka ACMC, is a Law Student and a Certified Mediator/Conciliator in Nigeria. He is also a Developer with knowledge in HTML, CSS, JS, PHP and React Native. Samuel is bent on changing the legal profession by building Web and Mobile Apps that will make legal research a lot easier.