How To Make People Respect You: Respect is reciprocal, but most times it doesn’t work that way as Respect is a feeling of admiration for somebody because of their good qualities or achievements. Hence, Respect is usually earned rather than just reciprocated. It is Courtesy and acting respectfully that could be reciprocated, but having utmost respect for someone comes from your admiration of such person or the actions and achievements of such a person. For instance, I can have utmost respect for someone who I have never seen. That person didn’t need to reciprocate any respect to earn mine.
Respect is a Universal word and also a Universal action, as in every facet of life, there must be a share of respect amongst humans be it in Church, Sports, Organization, School, or other work place. Most often in work places, Employers and high ranking workers enforces Respect through Fear, but there is a difference between a person doing something out of fear of the consequences for failing to perform an action and doing something out of respect. The latter naturally comes from the place of respect and loyalty to your boss because such boss has earned such Respect and Loyalty.
Respect goes beyond speech, and is demonstrated through actions. Respect could be demonstrated through showing a Polite behaviour towards somebody (this I refer to as Courtesy) and showcasing the feeling of admiration for a person because of their good qualities and achievements, this we refer to in this Article as Respect.
To make people Respect you, you need to earn such a Respect from People. To earn the respect of others, you may consider the following ways.
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Ways To Earn the Respect of Others
1. Being a Leader: Being a Leader doesn’t necessarily mean being a Political office holder, but you may be a leader anywhere you are; be it your Classroom, Office, Church or Organization.
When you are a Leader or find yourself in a Top position, it is naturally expected that people especially the people you’re leading should respect you, but it doesn’t end there. As a Leader you must earn the respect of these people especially in a Workplace, and you may earn such respect through Excellent Communication with them, Emotional Intelligence in dealing with them, controlling your body language, acting right towards your subjects, being kind and considerate, setting boundaries, being reliable and accountable.
Acting in the above light will make people believe in you and have Respect for you as a Leader and as a Person.
2. Allowing your Actions to Speak: One way to earn the respect of people is through your achievements and giant strides, but one of the easiest ways to lose the respect people have for you is through bragging and telling them about your Achievements and how good you are.
It is best to allow your action rather than words do the speaking for you. When you do so, you will definitely earn the respect of people. For instance, If I’m acting respectful to somebody and the person acts in the same manner as a casual person who is respectful, and one day the person sees me on the television and hears about my achievements, surely my achievements and humility towards such a person and in dealing with such a person will definitely earn the person’s respect for me, but if I’m a braggart and a loudmouthed person, the person in question will rather lose their respect for me.
You don’t need words to earn respect. For instance, there was a popular story of a Company which had a rule that the gate should not be opened at a specified time during Weekends. One day the CEO of the Company was coming to the Company at such odd hour, the Gateman who was just recently employed and didn’t know the CEO facially, refused the CEO entrance into the gate of the Company, saying that it was the instruction given to him not to allow anyone in at that time of the day. The CEO did not argue nor show himself, rather he drove back home. Few days later, the Gateman discovered that the man he sent back some days ago was the CEO, you can imagine how shock and disappointment at himself for disrespecting someone that is paying his Salary, he went to apologize, but the CEO only applauded him for doing his job well.
Imagine if when he refused to open the gate that day, the CEO came down from his Car and started bragging about how he is the owner of the Company? Or out of Anger sacks or threatens to sack the Gateman? But this reaction of the CEO by politely obeying the company’s order, definitely earned him the respect of the Gateman for Life!
Allowing actions rather than words speak for you definitely helps you to earn the respect of others.
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3. Helping Others: Nothing beats personal impact on people or people having a great encounter with you. This will give them a great mindset about you even if you are a terrible person.
When you help people when they really need it, it will definitely give these people in question some sense of loyalty to you and this will earn their respect for you.
4. Being Transparent: Respect usually comes through the admiration of one’s qualities. Integrity, Honesty, Accountability, Hardwork, and transparency are qualities desirous by people, especially in a Workplace. Hence, if you have these qualities, you will definitely earn the respect of Co-workers and other people in your workplace and beyond.
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5. Keeping Promises: Promise is an assurance that you will do something for somebody. As humans, we all make promises and being of a person of Integrity and honesty means that you always fulfill all promises you have made. When you always fulfill your promises made to people, they will have respect for you.
6. Being Respectful to Others: Most often, to get respect you need to give respect. People are more inclined to respect you when you respect them and treat them nicely. But it doesn’t end at just showing respect, you should show value, qualities which people admire, and also employ the aforementioned ways in this Article; this will not just make people respect you, but will totally earn their Respect for you.
When you are in a leadership position, you are honest, accountable, helping people, keeping promises, and showing respect to your subjects, you will definitely earn their full respect for you and what you represent.
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7. Being Valuable: Being a person of Value is like having Honey, it will attract Bees. When you are a person of Value, people will be attracted to working and dealing with you, and people will definitely respect you because you have a lot to offer.
8. Accepting your wrong: As Humans, emotional Intelligence is key. When you are emotionally Intelligent, you will know when to speak, react, and admit to your wrongs. Nothing pleases people especially Junior workers more than when their Boss is Wrong and wholly admits to such wrong instead of blaming others or making excuses.
When you are wrong, and always admit to your wrong in this manner, co-workers will definitely have respect for you.
9. Act wisely: Action speaks louder than words. Hence, you need to act wisely and this will definitely earn you more Respect. When you act wisely you will know when to speak, when to act, and when to remain silent.
Often times, it is better to remain silent and be thought to be a fool, than to Speak and remove all doubts. When people perceive or see you as a fool, they will definitely not respect you well, but when people see you as a Rational person who acts wisely, they will definitely Respect you.
10. Being Slow to Anger: In Acting Wisely, you need to also know how to react to situations. In difficult situations, you need to be calm and calculated irrespective of the emotions that may be attached to such a situation and importantly you need to be slow to anger as being slow to anger will help you to be calm and calculated in the midst of an intense Situation, and this will make you know how to perfectly react to such a Situation.
Being always angry or not being able to control your anger will only make you to act in a Manner which people despise, would hurt the feeling of people, or make people bear a grudge against you. When either of these three things occur, they will be definitely be no respect shared between you and such a person, but if you are a person who is slow to anger; you will react better in a difficult situation, and people will appreciate it and respect you more.
For example: If me, the CEO of NBB group of companies, gives a task to one of my employees by name Success to execute, and Success executes such a task so poorly that it incurs loss on our company, and out of anger to her underperformance of such Task I slap her and sack her from the company. This my reaction caused by Anger will definitely not make Success respect me. But if I am a person slow to anger, and such a thing happens, and I call Success out privately, make her see the harm she has caused to the Company, tell how her she can avoid such a mistake next time, assure her that she still has my trust provided she keeps abiding to my instructions and will never repeat such a Mistake again.
This my latter reaction will definitely give Success some sense of belonging, Confidence, will make her avoid such a mistake next time, will make her perform even better at work because she now feels that she owes me a debt of delivering and performing better, and importantly, this will earn the utmost respect of Success for me and my company.
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In Conclusion, we can all agree as Humans we want respect, we want to be appreciated, we want to be recognized and to be well respected, but Respect is only earned and these ways so mentioned in this Article will help you to earn the respect of others.
Importantly, we need to show respect to others. We need to abide by the Golden Rule of doing to others what you want to be done to yourself. If you abide by this Golden Rule and always respect others, people will also Respect you and act nicely to you too.
Edeh Samuel Chukwuemeka ACMC, is a Law Student and a Certified Mediator/Conciliator in Nigeria. He is also a Developer with knowledge in HTML, CSS, JS, PHP and React Native. Samuel is bent on changing the legal profession by building Web and Mobile Apps that will make legal research a lot easier.